Last week I talked about why young adults are not really feeling church anymore and the issues they have with attending church as well as the issues they are dealing with personally that keep them from church.
This week, I want to suggest some possible elements that will help young adults find there way, first and foremost, back to God and then to the church. These are some helpful hints that I have found practical in my world that will help in this regard. I realize that some of these are not readily accepted because they go against what some call: Traditional Church. With some who embrace traditional church as the ONLY way to do or have church, what I am suggesting may be looked at as not of God, but hey, this is not about people who are already in church...its about those who aren't. So here they are some practical, helpful hints on how to reclaim or get young adults back in the church.
1. When they come back please don't judge them; instead of judging them, take that energy and love on them! They have been dealing with things that many of us have never dealt with and don't even understand. So to judge where they have been, how they look, and why they are wearing what they are wearing as they come back to church is not the best place to start.
2. As they grow, allow them a place of service in the church. Young adults, I believe perform best under responsibility. If we allow them areas within the church to lead out, serve, help and function, I believe that they will not only come but bring others.
3. The worship service must change! Before you crucify me, please understand that nowhere in the bible are we told how to have church on the weekend. There are no instructions that you MUST have a call to worship, repeat an affirmation of faith, place a song here, and preach there...Its all either tradition OR opinion on how the community that worships together should worship. However, with young adults "HIGH CHURCH" pushes them away. They literally cannot understand the 'why of some of the elements in some of our services. Most people will say things like: "We shouldn't change our service to fit a particular group of people". However what makes that service holier than another when none of it is necessarily biblical prescribed? Do you want young adults back? Change the worship service...
4. Hold them accountable. Believe it or not, young adults want to be held accountable, but they enjoy it more from people who they can trust and who they know genuinely care about them. Generation X'ers can sniff people who they know don't really care about them. But when you care, they want you to hold them accountable to what God expects from and of them. Encourage, encourage, encourage...If you only see them once a month right now, let them know how much you have missed them, and that you have been praying for them (this means you have to pray for them...remember if you say you are, but aren't...they can tell...LOL)
These are not exhaustive, but just some tips in my world I know will help to reclaim young adults back to church...
Monday, June 25, 2012
Monday, June 18, 2012
Young Adults
As promised, wash's world blog will come at you EVERY Monday. I will continue to blog about my health as it relates to Lyme Disease but will also blog about current events, the church, and life in general.
Most of you know that a have great passion for youth and young adults. I came across an article by a ministry magazine that talked about why young adults leave the church. This is the age group of around 19-35, and it was addressing how many people who have grown up in church, begin quitting church during this time frame in their lives. I think many of us who are in church assume that the devil has fully gotten hold of people, they don't want to take responsibility, or a shaking within the church is happening and people are leaving.
I would suggest, that there are issues much deeper than what we may see...that are NOT being addressed. So, take it or leave it...I'm giving you the reasons, from this ministry magazine as to why young adults quit church...Its definitely something to think about.
1. Young Adults have been hurt. They have been hurt by families as well as the church. Many young adults who have been hurt by the church, because of decisions they have made in their adolescence, have scarred them tremendously. Their thinking is...if these are the people who hurt me, I don't want any parts of church...
2. Adult Life or College Life doesn't mix with church. As young adults get older, they love to try new things. The new things that they want to try do not mix with church. So instead of going back and forth between the new things and church, they just settle into doing, the new things.
3. There is no natural bridge to church. When young adults leave home and either go off to college or change scenery, there is often nothing where they land at, that helps them navigate through life's waters.
4. Young Adults are distracted. Oftentimes, its not that young adults don't care, its just that they are dealing with SOOO many things and going to church is the last thing on their mind.
5. Young Adults are skeptical. Young adults as well as generation x do not have loyalties to institutions. This is extremely crucial in our understanding of what is going on in their minds. Because they don't have loyalties to institutions they rarely accept things that represent institutional living, which oftentimes the church is guilty of.
6. Young Adults are exhausted. More young adults are going to college than previous generations. They are busy paying back student loans and credit cards. They are working full-time jobs, trying to maintain marriages as well as parenting...they are tired.
7. Young Adults don't get it. Young adults are the MOST unchurched generation in a long time. In many cases they are not guilty of quitting church...they never started in church. Many young adults are discouraged because they churches in their neighborhoods or the ones that they have grown up in are NOT addressing their needs and position in life, so they don't understand or don't get why they should waste their time going...it doesn't help them.
Food for thoughts...
Most of you know that a have great passion for youth and young adults. I came across an article by a ministry magazine that talked about why young adults leave the church. This is the age group of around 19-35, and it was addressing how many people who have grown up in church, begin quitting church during this time frame in their lives. I think many of us who are in church assume that the devil has fully gotten hold of people, they don't want to take responsibility, or a shaking within the church is happening and people are leaving.
I would suggest, that there are issues much deeper than what we may see...that are NOT being addressed. So, take it or leave it...I'm giving you the reasons, from this ministry magazine as to why young adults quit church...Its definitely something to think about.
1. Young Adults have been hurt. They have been hurt by families as well as the church. Many young adults who have been hurt by the church, because of decisions they have made in their adolescence, have scarred them tremendously. Their thinking is...if these are the people who hurt me, I don't want any parts of church...
2. Adult Life or College Life doesn't mix with church. As young adults get older, they love to try new things. The new things that they want to try do not mix with church. So instead of going back and forth between the new things and church, they just settle into doing, the new things.
3. There is no natural bridge to church. When young adults leave home and either go off to college or change scenery, there is often nothing where they land at, that helps them navigate through life's waters.
4. Young Adults are distracted. Oftentimes, its not that young adults don't care, its just that they are dealing with SOOO many things and going to church is the last thing on their mind.
5. Young Adults are skeptical. Young adults as well as generation x do not have loyalties to institutions. This is extremely crucial in our understanding of what is going on in their minds. Because they don't have loyalties to institutions they rarely accept things that represent institutional living, which oftentimes the church is guilty of.
6. Young Adults are exhausted. More young adults are going to college than previous generations. They are busy paying back student loans and credit cards. They are working full-time jobs, trying to maintain marriages as well as parenting...they are tired.
7. Young Adults don't get it. Young adults are the MOST unchurched generation in a long time. In many cases they are not guilty of quitting church...they never started in church. Many young adults are discouraged because they churches in their neighborhoods or the ones that they have grown up in are NOT addressing their needs and position in life, so they don't understand or don't get why they should waste their time going...it doesn't help them.
Food for thoughts...
Wednesday, June 6, 2012
Gossip...
Why do we love to spread gossip? Is it that we love to tell the untold? Is it that we enjoy seeing people's reactions to the information that we are telling them? What is it about us that enjoys tearing down people's character, and whispering about them instead of talking to them. In case you didn't realize it, I would argue that gossiping is not of God! What pains me however is that in a lot of churches, we will discipline and look down on people who may have a child while not being married, yet we say nothing to the millions of people who go around gossiping and talking down about people. The bible says that: "A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid a man [or woman] who talks too much” (Proverbs 20:19).
I have realized a couple of reasons why people gossip. These reasons of course are not exhaustive, there definitely could be more. Let me share them with you.
1. Some people gossip because they literally have nothing else to do. Some people's lives are so uneventful that they get enjoyment out of talking about the events in other people's lives. If you enjoy gossiping, I would encourage you to get active in something so that you won't have time to think about and talk about other people.
2. Some people gossip to mask all of the dysfunction in their own lives. Some people have so much stuff going on in their own personal lives that they gossip to deflect attention to someone else. Its almost a defense mechanism as to not deal with the issues in their life.
3. Some people gossip because they think they are better than everyone else. Some of us believe justified in our gossip, because we somehow feel that it is our duty to share the untold. We think everyone should know whats going on and feel because we are not as bad off as them that means we should share it. The bible warns us that before we start doing this, we should take the plank out of our own eye...The reason we can gossip so easily is because when we look at other people we are actually seeing a reflection of our own dysfunction.
4. Lastly, some people gossip because they have honestly allowed the Enemy to use them. The bible tells us that the devil is the father of lies. It also teaches us that it was the devil who first started discord in heaven. He LOVES to cause confusion, disruption, and discord! Did I say he LOVES to do it? If he can use a person to spread information, regardless if its true or not, he will do it! Don't allow yourself to be used be the enemy!!!
Lets not allow the enemy to get glory by gossiping, but instead seek to lift someone up! Lets help, not hurt people! After all...thats what Jesus would do, wouldn't he?
I have realized a couple of reasons why people gossip. These reasons of course are not exhaustive, there definitely could be more. Let me share them with you.
1. Some people gossip because they literally have nothing else to do. Some people's lives are so uneventful that they get enjoyment out of talking about the events in other people's lives. If you enjoy gossiping, I would encourage you to get active in something so that you won't have time to think about and talk about other people.
2. Some people gossip to mask all of the dysfunction in their own lives. Some people have so much stuff going on in their own personal lives that they gossip to deflect attention to someone else. Its almost a defense mechanism as to not deal with the issues in their life.
3. Some people gossip because they think they are better than everyone else. Some of us believe justified in our gossip, because we somehow feel that it is our duty to share the untold. We think everyone should know whats going on and feel because we are not as bad off as them that means we should share it. The bible warns us that before we start doing this, we should take the plank out of our own eye...The reason we can gossip so easily is because when we look at other people we are actually seeing a reflection of our own dysfunction.
4. Lastly, some people gossip because they have honestly allowed the Enemy to use them. The bible tells us that the devil is the father of lies. It also teaches us that it was the devil who first started discord in heaven. He LOVES to cause confusion, disruption, and discord! Did I say he LOVES to do it? If he can use a person to spread information, regardless if its true or not, he will do it! Don't allow yourself to be used be the enemy!!!
Lets not allow the enemy to get glory by gossiping, but instead seek to lift someone up! Lets help, not hurt people! After all...thats what Jesus would do, wouldn't he?
Monday, May 14, 2012
Change your thinking...
I have realized in my world that the way I think towards and about certain things means a lot. The bible also says: As a man thinks in his heart so is he. Another way of putting it is, what you think about often can likely happen.
The last couple of weeks I have had to ask myself: "Why is it that most of us think more negatively on the outcome of situations than think positively about them?" All of us go through difficult situations. If you are breathing right now, there is something going on in your life that is probably not ideal and that you don't like. However I have come to know, learn, and understand that there are always more than one possible outcome for situations that we go through. For example: Someone has been in a really bad car accident and it doesn't look good, and the doctors say, then people around the situation say: There's a chance that he may not make it. As a believer, I HAVE to assume, that if there is a chance that he may NOT make it...there is also a chance that he WILL make it!!! I don't know why, but it seems to me that as people of God, we have to stop this negative thinking about every single situation in life. I don't know about you, but its annoying for me to hang around negative people!!! People that usually and often think the worst about every situation.
Do you realize that its also possible to dream up your own disaster? As a man thinks in his heart so is he! If you keep thinking death, its possible that death will happen; but what if you begin today to start thinking life?!?! WOW....Start believing that there is always another option, something else that could take place. Don't start believing the devil that negative experiences will always happen to you. Besides, Jesus didn't lie...He did tell us that we would have tribulations...BUT be of good cheer because I have overcome the world!
Can I suggest that you change your thinking today?!?! Can I suggest that you switch the outlook that you always have on every situation? Start today...
The last couple of weeks I have had to ask myself: "Why is it that most of us think more negatively on the outcome of situations than think positively about them?" All of us go through difficult situations. If you are breathing right now, there is something going on in your life that is probably not ideal and that you don't like. However I have come to know, learn, and understand that there are always more than one possible outcome for situations that we go through. For example: Someone has been in a really bad car accident and it doesn't look good, and the doctors say, then people around the situation say: There's a chance that he may not make it. As a believer, I HAVE to assume, that if there is a chance that he may NOT make it...there is also a chance that he WILL make it!!! I don't know why, but it seems to me that as people of God, we have to stop this negative thinking about every single situation in life. I don't know about you, but its annoying for me to hang around negative people!!! People that usually and often think the worst about every situation.
Do you realize that its also possible to dream up your own disaster? As a man thinks in his heart so is he! If you keep thinking death, its possible that death will happen; but what if you begin today to start thinking life?!?! WOW....Start believing that there is always another option, something else that could take place. Don't start believing the devil that negative experiences will always happen to you. Besides, Jesus didn't lie...He did tell us that we would have tribulations...BUT be of good cheer because I have overcome the world!
Can I suggest that you change your thinking today?!?! Can I suggest that you switch the outlook that you always have on every situation? Start today...
Monday, May 7, 2012
Scarred but Saved!
In my world, I have definitely learned that there are things that happen to us that we may never know why until we reach heaven. I have stopped placing my energy into why things happen and have placed more energy into what my response is to what has happened. Those who have been following my blog have read about the ongoing experiences that I have had with Lyme Disease. I praise God for progressive healing as well as lessons that I have learned through the process. I have also learned in my world that sometimes our healing is not in a miracle but in obedience! Sometimes our obedience my not come in a miraculous way but may come in our obedience to a doctor that He is going to use; sometimes it will not come through a mesmerizing testimony that 'wows' people when they hear it, but it may come in our obedience with changing our diet...
Yesterday marked another milestone for me. Another landmark that I can look back on and see the grace of God! I was on my way to the store yesterday and found my way in the parking lot looking for a place to park. As I was just about to exit the particular area of the lot and go to another to find an empty space, a county bus turned into me....and hit me. It seemed like it all went in slow motion. As the bus is coming towards me, I'm saying to myself: "Is this guy really about to hit me?" After calming down, I realized one thing...I am maturing in God!!! I walked out of the car saw the scratch and said to myself: "My car might be scarred but at least my life is saved." I remember some years ago being in a car accident and my reaction was saying some words that are not recorded in scripture.
Despite our frustrations, disappointment, and difficulties in life, God uses every experience to, in some way, bring us closer to him and help us realize how much He really loves us! There is something that you are going through RIGHT NOW, that I know is probably causing you much pain; but even though it hurts, please know and understand that you have some help!
God bless you, at the beginning of this week as you grow closer to God through your painful experiences, that you can realize how much he loves you!
Yesterday marked another milestone for me. Another landmark that I can look back on and see the grace of God! I was on my way to the store yesterday and found my way in the parking lot looking for a place to park. As I was just about to exit the particular area of the lot and go to another to find an empty space, a county bus turned into me....and hit me. It seemed like it all went in slow motion. As the bus is coming towards me, I'm saying to myself: "Is this guy really about to hit me?" After calming down, I realized one thing...I am maturing in God!!! I walked out of the car saw the scratch and said to myself: "My car might be scarred but at least my life is saved." I remember some years ago being in a car accident and my reaction was saying some words that are not recorded in scripture.
Despite our frustrations, disappointment, and difficulties in life, God uses every experience to, in some way, bring us closer to him and help us realize how much He really loves us! There is something that you are going through RIGHT NOW, that I know is probably causing you much pain; but even though it hurts, please know and understand that you have some help!
God bless you, at the beginning of this week as you grow closer to God through your painful experiences, that you can realize how much he loves you!
Monday, April 23, 2012
The weight of waiting
Some year ago I had a personal trainer that I went to three times a week. It was something that I somewhat enjoyed and yet there was so much pain involved. Anyone that works out and lifts weights knows that there are days you don't want to go to the gym. There are times when you trainer (if you have one) gets on your nerves that may cause you to say some words to them that are not found in the bible.
Its difficult at times to lift weights and keep pushing the weights off of your chest, legs or back in order to get desired results. As I reflect on my grueling experience of having a personal trainer and lifting weights, I can't help but to also think about how waiting can feel like a weight! Have you EVER had to wait on God???? Anyone who says that its easy to wait on God has either never waited on God...or is lying! The bible tells us that the secret things belong to God. Which means that you and I could think of 1000 different reasons why we are waiting and ALL of them could be wrong! Is God trying to build your character? Are you waiting because you are not ready to receive what he has for you? Do you have to wait because of disobedience?
I do know that God is a God of timing. As much as it sometimes may feel like it, I do not believe that God enjoys watching his children suffer. I just don't believe that God sits in heaven laughing while you and I struggle through waiting for our jobs, our homes, our relationships, and our healing. In fact there are many of you that are going to read this blog and while you are reading it you WILL be thinking of what you specifically are waiting on.
As one who has waited on God before, can I suggest to you some things that help, while you wait, so that it doesn't seem as much of a weight?
1. DO NOT hang around negative people! I truly believe that what you spend the most time around you end up emulating
2. Find bible texts that encourage you. I great one is: Isaiah 40:28-31. Go ahead and read that RIGHT NOW! I know you could do other things to seemingly help you through the pressing weight. I just know from my experience that reading the text really does help!
3. This one is real difficult: Go and be a blessing to someone. Get the focus off of yourself and go and be a blessing in the life of someone else. Our blessing often comes in blessing someone else!
4. Exercise. I know what your saying. I'm already sweating from waiting on God!!! I don't feel like exerting more energy! I have found, and others have told me as well, that exercising helps your positive attitude
5. Lastly, while you are waiting: DON'T stop worshipping God. When things get bad, you tend to walk away from the only person who can really help us: God! I am not saying this is easy, because we feel like why should we sing, why should we pray, why should we fellowship with other believers when we feel that God hasn't done anything for us. Well I hate to disrupt your thinking, but He has already done something. You think its really bad? It could be A LOT worse (His mercy and grace is whats keeping it from really going out of control). Draw closer to God while you wait.
There are definitely more things a person could do while they wait, but I wanted to pass on these key things that I believe are essential and helpful! Be blessed!
Its difficult at times to lift weights and keep pushing the weights off of your chest, legs or back in order to get desired results. As I reflect on my grueling experience of having a personal trainer and lifting weights, I can't help but to also think about how waiting can feel like a weight! Have you EVER had to wait on God???? Anyone who says that its easy to wait on God has either never waited on God...or is lying! The bible tells us that the secret things belong to God. Which means that you and I could think of 1000 different reasons why we are waiting and ALL of them could be wrong! Is God trying to build your character? Are you waiting because you are not ready to receive what he has for you? Do you have to wait because of disobedience?
I do know that God is a God of timing. As much as it sometimes may feel like it, I do not believe that God enjoys watching his children suffer. I just don't believe that God sits in heaven laughing while you and I struggle through waiting for our jobs, our homes, our relationships, and our healing. In fact there are many of you that are going to read this blog and while you are reading it you WILL be thinking of what you specifically are waiting on.
As one who has waited on God before, can I suggest to you some things that help, while you wait, so that it doesn't seem as much of a weight?
1. DO NOT hang around negative people! I truly believe that what you spend the most time around you end up emulating
2. Find bible texts that encourage you. I great one is: Isaiah 40:28-31. Go ahead and read that RIGHT NOW! I know you could do other things to seemingly help you through the pressing weight. I just know from my experience that reading the text really does help!
3. This one is real difficult: Go and be a blessing to someone. Get the focus off of yourself and go and be a blessing in the life of someone else. Our blessing often comes in blessing someone else!
4. Exercise. I know what your saying. I'm already sweating from waiting on God!!! I don't feel like exerting more energy! I have found, and others have told me as well, that exercising helps your positive attitude
5. Lastly, while you are waiting: DON'T stop worshipping God. When things get bad, you tend to walk away from the only person who can really help us: God! I am not saying this is easy, because we feel like why should we sing, why should we pray, why should we fellowship with other believers when we feel that God hasn't done anything for us. Well I hate to disrupt your thinking, but He has already done something. You think its really bad? It could be A LOT worse (His mercy and grace is whats keeping it from really going out of control). Draw closer to God while you wait.
There are definitely more things a person could do while they wait, but I wanted to pass on these key things that I believe are essential and helpful! Be blessed!
Monday, April 9, 2012
Preparation is Key
Those who have been following the blog know that I have been having more than a difficult time over the last three years. Back and forth to the hospital. In and out of doctors offices. Taking medicine, too many to name, and just overall adjustments to life. When you have a lot going on: physical pain, mental discouragement, and no immediate answers as to why what is happening is happening, its easy to throw pity parties and continually feel sorry for yourself. I will admit that what I have gone through and what many of you may be going through now, can be an extremely lonely time in your life. Regardless of what people see you look like they have no idea of the rough road that you have been traveling. A smile can definitely say a thousands words...one of those words it could say is that: I'm smiling just to cover up the pain.
Feeling alone in your experience though, is not an altogether bad thing. Remember, it was John's isolation that brought about his glorious revelation of Jesus Christ. I really do believe that God can show you more by yourself than he can in a crowd. As I claim healing for myself and am what I believe to be on the other side of my valley, I have learned that preparation is key. There is so much that God wants to do in our lives that if we would be honest with ourselves...we are not really prepared for. We are currently NOT prepared for many of the things that God wants to accomplish through us! As much as we would like to believe we are...We are NOT ready for marriage, NOT ready for that job promotion, NOT currently prepared for the move...and what God is trying to do now, is prepare you! Preparation is KEY!!!
If you are like me then you oftentimes don't like waiting. However what God is trying to do in you, because of you...takes a process, it takes time. So God works on your character so that when you get to the place that he wants you to be you have the character to keep you where the assignment of God is trying to take you. It would be a terrible thing if we didn't have the character to keep us where God ultimately wanted us to be and in order for that to happen, it takes preparation.
I have learned in my world, in this season of illness, to not magnify the illness but magnify the preparation. In other words: God what do I need to learn during this season of my life? What area in my character are you exactly working on? What needs to be accomplished now that I can't accomplish later?
Don't worry about the pain...its just preparation!
Feeling alone in your experience though, is not an altogether bad thing. Remember, it was John's isolation that brought about his glorious revelation of Jesus Christ. I really do believe that God can show you more by yourself than he can in a crowd. As I claim healing for myself and am what I believe to be on the other side of my valley, I have learned that preparation is key. There is so much that God wants to do in our lives that if we would be honest with ourselves...we are not really prepared for. We are currently NOT prepared for many of the things that God wants to accomplish through us! As much as we would like to believe we are...We are NOT ready for marriage, NOT ready for that job promotion, NOT currently prepared for the move...and what God is trying to do now, is prepare you! Preparation is KEY!!!
If you are like me then you oftentimes don't like waiting. However what God is trying to do in you, because of you...takes a process, it takes time. So God works on your character so that when you get to the place that he wants you to be you have the character to keep you where the assignment of God is trying to take you. It would be a terrible thing if we didn't have the character to keep us where God ultimately wanted us to be and in order for that to happen, it takes preparation.
I have learned in my world, in this season of illness, to not magnify the illness but magnify the preparation. In other words: God what do I need to learn during this season of my life? What area in my character are you exactly working on? What needs to be accomplished now that I can't accomplish later?
Don't worry about the pain...its just preparation!
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